As before I was searching for meaning,
Through others and approval.
I can’t fathom the belittling,
Through friends,
And peers.
The teacher who would be constantly
On my case.
About not listening,
And being spaced out,
All day.
Too serious and in my head.
As he made comments,
And mockery,
Without end.
I hated school,
Got mostly Cs,
Just to say I was passing.
Too busy in my own world,
Of music, horse-play,
And band gigs.
Although the words still ring,
Loudly in my ears,
About being stupid and socially weird,
And busy in my own world,
Of depression and fear of my own.
As I contemplate,
The journey and the steep hill,
My resurrection from the pit,
Of disguise and depression,
My self-made misery
Of despair.
Though others simply mirrored back
What I felt.
As I reflect,
On the mountain,
And the dangers,
Of the storm.
It all shaped who I am,
As I molded the clay,
Revived myself from the pit,
Sought myself,
And the divine,
And let go of the past.